There's generally a flirtatious element implied if the banter is between a man and a woman, but anyone can banter. Most male buddy movies consist of nothing more than bantering dialogue. If you really want to impress that waiter or waitress with your fancy vocabulary, try saying "How do you like my persiflage?" It's a fancy name for banter. Of course, they may hit you over the head if they don't understand, but that's the risk of using a bantering tone.